Bits of happy

I'm making a habit of carefully noting the small things that are really beautiful, fun and lovely about life. The silliest things can bring me a lot of happiness. Why not enjoy it and share it with you? Why not, I tell you!

Here they are. This week's happy little things:

Making my own bubble tea. Note the bright happy colors of the cooked boba. Just bubble tea in general really, but making my own boba is especially satisfying.

This impressively cool chandelier made from medicine bottles hanging in a San Francisco store window.

Frozen yogurt dates with biological sisters and sisters-at-heart.

Walks through the country. Also the color green.

Food art at In-N-Out. I know this is funny, but really, it just makes me smile.

Mochi from Trader Joe's. They're so pretty and so cool and refreshing. You can't not be happy about that.

I just noticed that many of the things on this list involve food. Such a simple and universal pleasure, no?

Many happy returns,

Chelsea

Welcome to the new site!

You found us! Yay!

It makes us so happy to have our new blog up and running. We're still working out some kinks and changing the design up a bit, but the basics are here and ready to go! Yippee for new projects.

We've got some exciting stuff coming up in the next couple of weeks, including but not limited to the following:

• New details about how we're facing our fears
• A shark week post, including information that could save your life
• Introduction of a new feature: Ways to Wear Vintage
• Food posts! Recipes! Life-giving manna!
• How we're being challenged to live radically
• Giveaways
• And more!

We are just brimming with excitement and can't wait to share our inspiration, things we've learned, and things we love.

Subscribe via Bloglovin or email on the right-hand side of this page. And don't hesitate to comment and let us know what you think of the new design. Suggestions for new features? Throw 'em our way.

Peace and love,

Brandie and Chelsea

Live every week like it's shark week.

This is our favorite time of year. Shark week. It's the week when we huddle around the television in rapt attention, poring over every detail as the Discovery Channel unfolds the mysteries of the great white, the mako, the tiger shark, the hammerhead, and their more obscure cousins.

We have a collective obsession with these majestic and terrifying creatures. They frighten and fascinate us.

So, in honor of shark week, we had a shark party. And watched Jaws. And ate these cupcakes:

We call them "Blood in the Water" cupcakes because of the surprise strawberry jam centers. Blue vanilla cake, blue buttercream, fondant shark fins. Heh. Gruesome, yes. Artificially-colored, yes. But fun.

And in light of this week's festivities, a short public service announcement:

We have several guidelines for ocean safety--developed over a lifetime of beach-going, surfing, paddling, boating, swimming--which can help all you beach-goers avoid any unwanted marine life interactions.

• No bleeding in the water. Obviously. 
• No touching. Do not touch your friends while swimming in the water. Especially if you are trying to be conscious of sharks, your friends will react in an unsavory manner. Just don't do it, no matter how funny you think it will be.
• Camouflage.  Avoid wearing red, yellow, and anything shiny. These colors excite sharks. Instead, wear ocean colors to blend in with your marine surroundings. 
• Turn 360 degrees at regular intervals. And don't just turn: look. Being aware of your surroundings could give you more time to reach shore safely should an unfriendly beast appear. 
• Silhouettes are not your friends. If you see a dark silhouette in the distance under water, swim away from it. NOT toward it. 

Trust us... we are experts. Remember these things, and live longer. Sharks will show you no mercy.

Swim away,

Brandie and Chelsea

Things I don't have to do

I don't know about the rest of you out there, but I find myself often weighted down with obligations. My life is full of great pursuits and great people, and I am so grateful for those many blessings I have. But I am also frequently beset by the impression that I "have to" do certain things in order to be a good person/daughter/friend/Christian/employee/sister/student. Like I have to work to earn the blessings that -hmmm- have already been given to me.

I guess I feel like I have to conform to what everyone expects of me. The expectations that because I went to a good school and got my degree that I should be working a high-paying corporate job. The oh-my-she's-26-and-not-married-yet-will-she-ever-be attitude that I know is out there. Even the assumption that I should be conservative, or liberal, to be on the "proper" side. Some of these impressions come from outside sources, from my culture, from family or friends. But the desire to meet those expectations comes from my own sinful self. I see those "norms" and want to live up to the standard out of my own pride, or out of the fear of disappointing people.

This struggle to appease others and soothe my own ego leaves me feeling pulled in so many directions that my mind, body and spirit are exhausted.

But I'm realizing more and more that these pressures are destructive. I am learning the difference between striving after holiness because of love (which really leaves me free and full of joy) and striving to be good for selfishness (which imprisons me with my own failures). I need to not only stifle but thoroughly extinguish this second mindset if I want to live a life that brings God the MOST glory.

And I do want that. I want to radiate joy, to do what fulfills my ultimate purpose--to worship the Creator and point others to Him. He has already redeemed me, and my gratitude overwhelms me, pushing me to act, to serve, to love. The other things--these "expected things"--don't matter.

So I decided to make a list of things that I don't need to do. I appear to be in a list-y kind of mood lately. ;)  This one was a valuable little exercise for me, to admit to myself that these things are not critical.

(Disclaimer: I may in fact want to do some of the things on this list. Perhaps I will do them. The thing is, I don't HAVE to do them. And putting them in that perspective helps.)

I don't have to:

*work 9 to 5
*make more money than I need
*look perfect
*own things
*use my degree
*get married
*have children
*be stylish
*care about celebrity news
*go to grad school
*stay home
*strive to please everyone
*diet
*be calculating and planned-out
*have a plethora of friends
*compete with coworkers
*be outgoing
*be afraid

Now, this isn't just a way to excuse lackadaisical behavior. If you know me, you know that I work hard and will strive for excellence in all my pursuits. It's about my motives and the source of my direction, which I hope will continue to be more and more pure as the days go by.

Oh how happy are we,

Chelsea

Map by Amy R

30 New Things

illustration via anachronism

Trying new things is the best way to learn and grow. We love learning, we love growing and we love newness, so we're making a list of 30 New Things we want to do before we turn 30. Inspired by the lovely Sarah Von of Yes and Yes, our list is collaborative. Some of these things are new for only one or the other of us, but most will be new for both of us, so we're going to try to do these things together. It's kind of like a 5 year plan, but much more.... scattered? Piecemeal? Whimsical. Yes.

Just to be clear, neither of us is 30 years old yet. We have several years to go before we cross that particular milestone. We're still young, dang it!

Some of these are silly little things. Others are giant adventures or permanent decisions, hence the niceness in giving ourselves more than just one year to accomplish it all. The list is still a work in progress. Take a look.

30 New Things Before 30

*see the tops of the redwood trees
*learn how to make cheese
*write a fan letter
*go snowshoeing
*participate in traditional Catholic confession
*go rappelling
*go camping (for real, as an adult, with no fire-making/tent-pitching assistance)
*submit a poem or short story for publication
*perform at an open mic night
*visit South America
*visit Africa
*visit Australia (this will attain the over-arching goal of seeing all continents)
*start an Etsy shop
*swim with sharks... but in a protective cage, please
*hike Half Dome
*eat a truffle (the mushroom, not the candy)
*skydive
*climb a glacier
*see the Grand Canyon
*visit NYC as adults, not just 8th-grade-field-trippers
*go to the toy tricycle race in San Francisco
*attend a music festival. How have we not done that yet??
*go to a comedy club
*karaoke, for real. Wait, what is real karaoke?
*ride a dogsled
*try public speaking
*carry out an epic New Year's Eve plan (we talk big about NYE but never follow through)
*get a tattoo
*learn to knit

Anything new you want to accomplish this year? Or over the next couple of years? Have any suggestions for us? We still need to add a few things to this list. Inspire us!

Enjoy this rainy weather while we have it. It'll be 120 degrees before you know it.

Love,

Chelsea and Brandie

P.S. -We will keep you updated on our progress through these activities. Posts are promised for each completed activity, including the ones we've already crossed off. Yes, we started early. The early bird catches the worm, you know.

On Reading and Writing

Writing and reading decrease our sense of isolation.  They deepen and widen and expand our sense of life: they feed the soul.  When writers make us shake our heads with the exactness of their prose and their truths, and even make us laugh about ourselves or life, our buoyancy is restored.  We are given a shot at dancing with, or at at least clapping along with, the absurdity of life, instead of being squashed by it over and over again.  It's like singing on a boat during a terrible storm at sea.  You can't stop the raging storm, but singing can change the hearts and spirits of the people who are together on the ship.
---Anne Lamott

Why Pessimists Make the Best Optimists

Maybe pessimism isn't such a curse if multiple pessimists join forces. Somehow we pessimists turn our natural negativity around for good when we're together.

Quick disclaimer: Be warned, this opinion comes from the perspective of a serious pessimist. Two of them, really (so take it with as many grains of salt as you see fit).

We are two pessimists who’ve lived under one roof for several years now.  And when we say pessimist, we mean all the lovely second-hand glasses at our house are almost always half empty. You might think that this would be a recipe for miserable disaster. Picture two girls at home alone wallowing in despair, egging each other on into deeper depression, uselessness, and weepy movie marathons... terrible! 

But it’s not like that.

Just because we’re pessimistic does not mean we can't see the bright side. We can see it, and we like to see it. And just because we’re pessimists doesn’t mean that we don’t have joy. We laugh every day, and we love it.

And the thing is--even though we naturally take a negative viewpoint--there is another instinct that takes over sometimes, particularly if one of us is feeling down. We want to help each other feel better, so we instinctively take turns at holding a positive view.

Love is stronger than pessimism.

As fellow pessimists, we understand what it’s like to feel negative and why we react to situations the way we do. We also understand each other pretty well after 14 years of friendship.

For instance, when Brandie is giving a depressed Chelsea very reasonable advice and Chelsea glares at Brandie, Brandie understands that that glare means that she is listening, and she knows that her friend is right. If Chelsea lived with an optimist, that optimist friend might interpret that glare differently and have her feelings hurt, deciding to stop giving Chelsea advice (and thereby leaving Chelsea to wallow in her negativity). Brandie is neither offended nor deterred. She simply smiles back at her. And vice versa. 

We are so thankful that when one of us is down, the other is almost always ready to pick her up and shine some perspective on the situation.

In our experience, optimists always looks at the bright side, often making nice but largely-unhelpful statements like “this is happening for a reason,” or “it’s always darkest before the dawn,” or “this is a season,” or “I’m sure it’s not all bad,” or “don’t worry, be happy." This is sweet and well-intentioned, but pessimists like us don’t respond very well to nice generalizations like these.  Instead, we respond to reasonable arguments exposing the flaws in our own outlooks. Because we’re not just spouting off happy sayings at each other, we can logically determine what might be effective and helpful advice.

We love optimists. In fact, we depend on a few key optimists in our lives that bring us joy. We couldn't manage without them. But don’t count the pessimists out when you’re looking for the bright side. We can see what's in that glass just as well as you. :) 

--Brandie and Chelsea